Posted by on May 30, 2014 in Uncategorized | 5 comments

I posted last month about how Ryan adamantly does not want to grow up.

I should have titled that post “Things Ryan Insists Upon On a Daily Basis, Part 1”.

Part 2 would be this:

His. Name. Is. RYAN. You ignorant fool!

It began innocently enough. We’d call out to him with something cute like, “Come on, ya little tater tot, let’s go!

And he’d respond with unexpected fury: “I. Am. Not. A. Tater. Tot! My. Name. Is. RYAN!

Or we’d give him a compliment:

Wow, you look so tan!

I’m not tan! My name is Ryan!

Or we’d demonstrate respect:

“Oh, yes sir!”

“I’m not a sir! My name is Ryan!”

Naturally, as soon as we discovered the heightened level of annoyance he felt at being called a random name, we could no longer control it. Cutesy nicknames began flying about with abandon.

On any give day, he might be a Hummus Head, Stinker Face or Buster Brown. We might make reference to the fact that he appears to resemble a hot dog, a rhino or a snicker doodle.

Each name is met with the same sort of infuriated resistance. “I. Am. NOT. A. Potato Chip! My Name is Ryan!

I have good news, though. Occasionally, at the end of his rant, he adds that he is a “big boy.” For example: “I am not a little beach bum! My name is Ryan The Big Boy!

Perhaps we’re making progress on Part 1?